T-Shirts

Wherever you go, there's always a guy with a smart-ass T-shirt. We all like them and turn around after the guy with a cool slogan on his chest. The reason? No reason at all, given that most of the time WE are the ones being insulted. Just a sample of some T-shirt slogans:

Ever wondered what would happen if you go to a guy and tell him "You suck"? He'll probably beat the crap out of you. So, for all to see, yet for none to grasp, is a golden opportunity. You can insult everyone around you and the only consequence that follows, is that everybody thinks you're witty, smart and, in general, a funny, nice guy. Don't get my idea yet, do you? Well, it's pretty simple and it revolves around a backpack. A backpack full of T-shirt. And to be even more precise - a backpack full of smart-ass T-shirts for all occasions. If you can insult the whole world and get away with it, why can't you do other miserable stuff and get away with it, too? For example, you go on a date with your girlfriend. You just cheated on her and now that little worm - your conscience is feeling guilty. If you tell her "Honey, I just slept with your best friend." she'll get mad at you, slap you, yell at you, do some more girl stuff and then dump you right away. But, if you're smart, you'll just pull a T-shirt from your backpack saying "Honey, I fucked other girls all night" and all you'll get will be a slight grin and a "You are a bad boy" kind of line. The landlord is threatening to throw you out if you don't pay the rent? Just put on "You'll get absolutely no money from me, asshole!" T-shirt and watch him laugh. Your mom wants you to throw the garbage? Get a "Do that yourself, I have more important stuff to do, like watch porn, so get out of my room!" slogan on your chest. She'll only giggle for a second and do the miserable task by herself. And then you can get on with the more important stuff - the porn.

Can't you see the whole world of new opportunities that lies before you? And you're at the mere threshhold. Or, are you an unbeliever, that is looking for a proof? Here it is: